Of Cockroaches and Women

Dear Mr. Cockroach-the-size-of-a-small-frog,Your impromptu visit this morning was not appreciated. It was extremely rude of you not to knock at the front door like all normal company.   Even if you had I would not have let you in and certainly would have scolded you for nonchalantly crawling across my dining room floor towards the kitchen if my scream had not been frozen in my throat {I think my heart also stopped beating for a second}.  Coming over unannounced like you did was not nice {wherever it is that you came from; I have no idea and I don’t even want to think about it}.  I hope you like your temporary home under the Mason jar under the mixing bowl; had to be sure you couldn’t escape.  When hubby comes home he will give you more permanent situation. The only reason you’re still wriggling is because I couldn’t get him to come home early. I hope the rest of your family {please, may you have none!} takes the hint.

Sincerely,

Me

p.s. if anyone needs me I’ll be on my hands and knees cleaning everything with bleach.

p.p.s. more photos for your enjoyment

p.p.p.s. I don’t really have chin-hair.

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